CHRISTY BELLA

AN AMERICAN BEAUTY THEME

MY HERO

IN LOVING MEMORY OF MY DAD, MY MIRACLE, MY HERO: JERRY CANNON JOINER

Miracles

I never believed in miracles until now. Today I witnessed a miracle in my life, and I never believed that miracles could happen. I have always believed in God, but when I begged God to perform extraordinary events through His divine power, nothing happened. When I found out that my hero (my dad) had terminal cancer, I prayed for a supernatural force to take the cancer out of him. I even bargained with God, and prayed that God would take me instead of my father; however, God does not make deals. I held my dad's hand as he received his last chemo treatment in the hospital, and I was the only person in the room when the doctor said that the cancer spread to the bones, and the treatments could no longer help. I felt so betrayed by the medical field, by cancer, and above all, I felt betrayed by God. How could God take the one gentleman who believed in me away from this earth? How could God allow my dad to suffer in pain? Why would God perform miracles for others but not for Jerry Cannon Joiner? These questions ran through my mind over and over again. I spent the next few months listening to my dad's heart beat, singing to him, and keeping him alive. It was the week of my birthday that the nurse pulled me away from the death bed and requested that I let go. She told me that my dad was hanging on in pain, agony, and distress for me, and I had to release him to go on to Heaven. All I recall is an ocean of tears clouding my sight, and I walked into his room the day of my birthday. The nurse told me what to say, and I repeated her like a robot, and it was that moment that I realized miracles did not exist in my world. God would not perform such an act of divine intervention for me. Needless to say, my dad died shortly after I released him, and a piece of me was buried with him. I felt empty, and the only hero I had died on my birthday. It took over a year for me to write my story. Grief overwhelmed me, and I could only turn to God. I prayed once again, with no expectations, for a miracle. All I wanted was to feel a sense of dignity again, and for God to perform an extraordinary event in my life that I could witness. Today, I am eternally grateful that miracles are real. I am pleasantly surprised at the outstanding conclusion that I call a miracle, and I owe it all to God. Since my father died, I have only existed, and I know now that I need to learn to live again. That is a true miracle, and I believe today miracles do happen.